A Mending State of Mind

Stitching the rip...

This week
I have been thinking
about ​fixing and mending.
​To me, fixing involves a tool kit used
to solve a specific problem which, when repaired,
provides a clear solution. Once fixed, we
move on, glad that the problem
has been resolved.

repairing the furnace

This was
what happened
a few days ago when our
furnace stopped working and two
guys came to repair it. It took some time
to diagnose the actual problem, but with their tool
kit in hand, they solved the issue. Done. 
House warm again. We move
on with our day.

the mending pile

A day
which, for me,
​involved mending - an
act that feels different from fixing.
Yes, there is a problem to solve - a lost button or
holes in a pair of joggers - But the problem
does not feel urgent, like a furnace
not working in the middle
of winter. 

the old duvet

The contents
of yesterday's mending
pile, for example, consisted of 
things with problems we had been living
with for years...literally. This tie on this vintage duvet
cover had been broken for longer than I can
remember, as had the missing button
on another duvet cover
​in the pile.

messy stitches

Mending 
does not have 
to be perfect, either.
Clearly, my stitches on the
duvet are a bit messy and the button
and thread color do not match
what was there before on
this night shirt.

mismatched buttons

My goal
was simple: Get
the job done & move on. That's
what I do in January. Finish projects,
clean up, clear out, and, as if often the case, mend
things, whether a missing button, a huge rip in my favorite
gardening clothes, my son's joggers,
or, perhaps, even the
​climate...

same overalls, similar rips, different strategies

But when
I started to mend the
huge rip on the back side of these
overalls, I got distracted, as can happen sometimes,
and decided to add some color, because, as it turns out, I had been
consolidating our thread collection earlier in the week and
happen to have found this fabulous
green (ooh I love run-
on sentences).

what if?

And I thought
it would be fun to add
some curves to this otherwise
set of straight lines. So suddenly my 'get-
the job done' mending turned into
​something else entirely. 

the seduction of curves

I became 
entranced by the
colors, shapes and textures 
that emerged. I know. These joggers
are completely absent of
​color.

losing change from jogger pockets

But the 
shapes and 
textures were so
cool and the feeling of the
wool fabric I used to repair the holes
so soft, I just had to share these 
​images  and this project
​with you.

textures of mending

Because
I realized, in the
midst of it all, that mending
is about tending to an ongoing relationship
with something or someone, whether it's a piece
of clothing, your dog or your son. Yes, there is a particular
problem that emerges at the moment, but in the process of mending
it, you change the actual structure of that which is being
mended by adding thread, new fabric, new
colors ​or new shapes. 

a very very mellow companion

And,
it turns out,
you can change the
structure of yourself as well.
Or at least, that's what happens to
me when I sit and sew. I hang out with my
dog, who hangs out with me. We ​both breath more
slowly. I have no idea what he thinks about,
but I stay focused on each stitch,
mindfully mending in
​that moment.

there will always be need for another button

But even
as I sew on buttons
and patch holes in joggers,
I'm thinking, always thinking, about
all those big issues out there in the world
for which we want a quick a fix, but which, in my
heart, I know may not be able to be fixed with a single tool
box at a single moment. The problems we face are just too big. But
it helps me to address them when I adopt a mending state of mind. Knowing
we will be in this for a while, I focus on relationships of all kinds and not
worry about perfection by knowing what is good enough
and by making sure I am open to altering my
plans by adding color here
and curves
​there.