We Are Not Alone

A place to share a story, AVA Gallery, Lebanon, NH Photo by ERSwett

Earlier
today I shared
my story in an empty
AVA studio with my work,
Casey Carpenter and his cameras.
It was raining & cold, but the light was lovely
& the space welcoming, as always.
I am here, I thought, in
​community.
At last.

A mix of this and that in community Photo by ERSwett

The
day began
with a 6am Zoom
call with Natalie Isaacs,
the founder of 1 Million Women.
With 1000 people from around the
globe I joined the conversation. We shared
joy in each other's company & inspired each other
to feel the collective power of our individual
actions. It was the perfect way to
close out Earth Month
​2020,

Some of what we accomplished this month! Screenshot from Ecochallenge.org

as was
this summary
of actions completed
by the Upper Valley Climate
Action 2020 team in this year's Earth
Day Ecochallenge. 34 of us showed up and
did a bunch of cool stuff. We were among more than
10,000 people & were 1 of 818 teams. Yay us! But now I'm
struggling with a sense of inadequacy I've felt all
month, a feeling that emerged, I think,
because I was being
measured.

Textures, Colors & Shapes Photo by ERSwett

What
am I to do,
I wonder, with the
joy of being in community
making a difference for people &
the planet and the simultaneous strange
anxiety that that participation creates? For me,
it means it's time to go to the compost,
and see if, once again, it can
help me make sense
of our ​world.

Earth Day 2020 Snow on the Compost Photo by ERSwett

On Earth
Day it was fresh
​snow & a few days later
it was a bunch of flying insects
among the shredded COVID-19 behavior
guidelines sent by our President. Hot and cold;
Inspired & anxious. Is that ​what I will
remember about Earth
Month 2020? 

Insects having a feast Photo by ERSwett

Measurable
data, whether from
an ecochallenge or a global
health crisis, is real & understandable.
When it comes to climate, I feel good that I have
done something to increase biodiversity or decrease waste;
​When it comes to health, I feel proud that I have
helped flatten the curve. But it feels like
that objectivity actually denies
me the visceral realities
of ​being human...

Silk scraps from my mother-in-law's hidden stash Photo by ERSwett

...like ​the
joy of arranging
silky colorful fabrics into
a 'collage' or the deliciousness
of these treats from Umpleby's, where
I collected compost earlier today
& purchased this weekly
"Stay-At-Home"
​'pick-me-up.'

Truffles & Russian Teacakes from Umpleby's in Hanover, NH Photo by ERSwett

As I ​ate
these treats, I reflected
on this collective need to 'be
counted,' whether in the economy, in an
Ecochallenge, or in this global crisis. Might this
slowing down invite us to think more deeply about
this connection between individuals and
the collective, whether on
​Zoom or in our
​kitchens?

Sarah & Chanler make dinner Photo by ERSwett

And in
the process, might
we also consider the differences
between what is actually counted and what
actually matters? If I counted everything that mattered,
I would no longer be living - - I would be
a counter, not a person. It would
be weird.

The first chives Photo by ERSwett

I fumbled
my way through the
EcoChallenge, just as I feel like
I am fumbling through this COVID-19 
situation. Flexibility and forgiveness of self and
others seem vital, especially when dealing with variable
weather and emotional fluctuations during a global pandemic!
But as the story I told this morning reveals (you'll
have to stay tuned for the actual video),
powerful things happen when
we honor moments of
tension & discord.

More rain and cold Photo by ERSwett

I'm
coming to 
understand not just
in my head, but deep in my
heart, that reconciliation with self in
relation to climate is possible, but only when in
community, whether that community is a bunch of plants
or garbage ​or really cool people at a place like AVA.
To learn more about this cool storytelling
stuff, check out Casey Carpenter's
work and stay tuned for
whatever comes
​next.

Selfie at AVA April 30, 2020

Please
​be vigilant,
stay safe & be
well. You and I are
not alone and we are
definitely in this
​together.